its funny how things can be. one minute i wish i was there with you, & another, i am so fucking happy i am here.

i think i just wish too much. i wish you loved me. i wish i was beautiful. i wish my words broke your heart. i wish my letters floated like when we breathe & how it hangs in white clouds (mingling). i wish she knew what happened. i wish you knew how i feel. i wish i wont have to open that letter & hear the screams & scolds.

but yet, i really do.

just fucking shoot my heart & then we can end it all there (!!!) plus, you wouldnt have to worry about taking me to the movies afterall.